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This is a list of Cynical News stories that I was actually too lazy to write up. You can just imagine the rest of the stories. These are works of humor and satire. Some of these are a bit dated. Not to be taken (too) seriously with any regularity. Fuck 'em if they can't take a joke.

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'War Against Terror' Now Called
'War Against the Not at All
Nice People who Want to Blow Us Up'

men running away from huge explosion

Scary  Terrorist Captive
Actually Torgo from MST3K

Famous terroristTorgo from Mystery Science Theater 3000


Pat Robertson Continues Slow, Steady Descent Into Madness

Pat Robertson with glazed eyes


George W. Bush Protected by Entourage
of Happy Oompa-Loompahs

George W. Bush and Oompah Loompahs


Separated at Birth?

Michael Jackson Richard Ramirez 'The Night Stalker'


Pope Still Dead

Grave of Pope John Paul


George W. Bush Wins Truman Capote Lookalike Contest

Oddly dressed George W. Bush

Schwarzenegger Can't Keep Hands Off Own Titties

Very out of shape Arnold Schwarzenegger


George W. Bush Yelling

Stoners Realize Secret to Universe,
Too Stoned to Write it Down

Stoners in front of band equipment

Serial Killer Has Long History
of Serial-Killing

Picture of BTK Killer

Area Man's Computer
Better-Maintained Than Own Body

Incredibly fat guy in front of computer

Internet Attention-Whores
Welcome Domestic Spying

Internet Attention Whore Jumping for Joy in front of computer

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